With Profound Sadness: In Memoriam

It's been a really bad coupla days here at the Billings KOA, so I'm gonna talk to you guys about it. I have here a little story for ya. It doesn't begin with 'Once Upon A Time' and it most certainly doesn't end 'Happily Ever After', BUT... it does have a moral, so you should read it.

Just after we arrived here, about the 3rd of May, we struck up a friendship with a couple from Sidney, Montana. Sidney is a little bitty town about four hours' drive north and east of Billings; the people I'm writing about today are named Tim and Jody Kohl.

Tim is a professional, a highly-skilled operator of a very specialized, gigantic machine that takes all types of scrap metal and shreds it into pieces about the size of a playing card. You get the point; after he's done with the junk, it can be easily re-smelted and recycled. He has been working under contract with an operation here in Billings for about six months; he and Jody have a 5th wheel similar to ours. They come here for about two weeks at a time, always stay right by us, and have been doing that all summer.

We met them right after we got here; they are about our age (well, MY age anyway) and are just the nicest people you'd ever wanna meet, real salt-of-the earth, no airs or drama, just a kind, normal couple. They've been married 27 years, and are still obviously very much in love. We barbecued together, walked the river together, shared RVing stories and tips, watched over each others' stuff when one of us was outta town, blah blah blah... and we've become quite close.

NOW, Jody has had a disease, a vicious, progressive autoimmune problem called Scleroderma. She's battled it for about 20 years, and it is one hateful, malicious son-of-a-bitch (sorry about the language, kids, but I am FURIOUS about this). By the time we met Tim and Jody, it had already cost her most of her fingers and toes, by way of circulatory and inflammatory problems that result in amputation. During the time we've known them, just this summer, she's lost four more digits, and by last week only had two thumbs and her pinkies remaining.

Despite this madness, Jody is always upbeat and positive, a warm and indomitably cheerful lady with a ready smile and, as far as we could see, absolutely no sense of self-pity. We just love her.

Yesterday, Thursday October 17th, Tim went to work for the first time since the latest round of surgery. He had stayed home at the trailer for several days... but the amputation process for them has, by now, become kinda routine (imagine THAT, boys and girls, if you can!); Jody said she would be fine and he should go on to work... so that's what he did.

As has become my habit when Tim is away, and especially after another surgery, I checked in on Jody about ten yesterday morning. The KOA is closing down for the winter; they were cleaning out the ice cooler, and they were just giving its contents away so they could get it outta there and turn off the machine. I know Tim and Jody don't have their ice maker hooked up, so I got a bag and took it over there. Knocked on the door, Jody yelled at me to come in, and I took the bag in and put it in their fridge. Talked to Jody; she was all wrapped up on the couch, feet and hands all bandaged up but, as always, this lovely, courageous woman smiled, and thanked me... and that was the last time anybody ever saw her alive.

About noon, we noticed (and were unsurprised) that Tim had arrived home; we thought nothing of it, as he is very diligent about checking on Jody and often comes at lunch to help with her medications. Next thing we knew, we heard sirens: close, then closer, now right next door. With an icy hand gripping my heart, I sprinted next door, and through the window I saw Tim. He was sobbing, head in hands. The paramedics hauled ass inside, tearing open packets of IV materials and other stuff, so I just stood outside listening to the anguished cries emanating from their just-this-morning-happy home.

The paramedics emerged in less time than I have ever seen, probably under five minutes, and started packing up their stuff; my worst fears were now confirmed. Tim appeared at the door, saw me standing helplessly by and, as if his heart had been torn from his body, "Scott... oh, Scott, SHE DIED!"... I will never forget that cry, it sounded like a puppy hit by a car... being a guy, I had only minimal help to give, so I just took Tim in my arms, helped him sit down, and ran like hell for my personal, professional grief counselor/trauma nurse Allison.

Well, we spent the next three hours dealing with the Chaplains, both from Yellowstone County Sheriff and Billings PD, and then the County Coroner came, and then a local funeral home arrived and loaded Jody into a Chevy van, a fricking CHEVY ASTRO, for Chrissakes!!! Oh, my, Tim was so CRUSHED... he had to call Jody's mother, and his and Jody's son, and oh, God, what a mess. We felt so bad for him, he loved her so much...

The stupid stock market, the recession, the 'Credit Crunch', whichever incompetent, self-serving, pompous moron gets to redecorate the White House, and everything else... they all mean less to me today. They all mean NOTHING today. In the end... loving, BEING loved; precious, irreplaceable connections with those who care for us; these things are all that matter. Find someone close to you and TELL THAT PERSON YOU LOVE THEM. Do it NOW.

You never know when it may be your very last chance.

That's all I got in me right now. Sorry about the bummer post.

S.